There’s a cornerstone of success I’ve noticed in myself, work, and clients over the years.

Success is first reflected in one’s relationship with vacillation rather than addictive intensity.

Most people with unwanted habits start with vacillation. They go back and forth between wanting to quit and getting side-swiped by urges and emotions.

It’s easy to assume success is contingent on strength of addiction, hormones, time, or genetics. It’s something else.

Those who will continue a compulsive habit delay success with all-or-nothing attitudes.

• “One more day and then I’ll start…”
• “I’ll start over tomorrow.”
• “I didn’t get the exact result I wanted, when I wanted, therefore it’s not working.”

They subconsciously interpret all vacillation as failure. 

Those who are on the verge of breaking an unwanted habit embrace wavering as an active part of the break-through.

• “I may not have ‘quit’ the habit today, but I took a specific step for quitting today.”
• “Even though I relapsed, I noticed something new about myself today.”
• “I’ve been at this too long alone, so I got help today.”

They leverage vacillation for progress.

It gets really interesting after successfully breaking a habit >

Often marked by:

The inexplainable.
Stillness. Wonder. Surprise.
Success may seem matter of fact.
Take your pick.

You get effortless consistency when vacillation ends.

The way quitting a habit fully crystallizes in each person is unique, but there’s something they all have in common.

A habit that used to be an uncontrollable temptation is now nothing but an old habit without a draw.